


After Everything

by NinjaHobbit242



Category: Free!
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-03
Updated: 2017-03-03
Packaged: 2018-09-28 02:52:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10067228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NinjaHobbit242/pseuds/NinjaHobbit242
Summary: The title isn't really great.Rin loves Haru; Rin loses Haru.I'm sorry it's so bad, I have a lot of emotions that all came out at once. Information about the disease is probably all wrong but I tried.No offense is intended.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, quick question here- is anyone in need of an editor?? I really enjoy looking through written works and finding grammatical errors that could interrupt the flow of the story but nobody I know is in need of something like that (other than English papers but what's the fun in doing that all the time?) So, if anyone needs that- please hit me up! Thank you!

In the beginning, all Rin wanted was a challenge, nothing else. But after witnessing the anomaly that is Haruka Nanase, he couldn't get enough. It became so much more than a good race, and Rin was suddenly spiraling into an abyss, but he wasn't sure it was such a bad thing.

 

Race after race, time after time, Rin slowly began to realize he was in too deep for his blue eyed friend. It scared him. So, he did the only thing he knew how- he ran. All the way to Australia under the premise that he wanted to swim better. _But Rin knew better, didn't he?_

 

He thought Australia was a good idea, thought it would help him clear his head. Boy was he wrong. After his first failure, he couldn't get back up. He was, for the first time in his life, utterly alone. Afraid. _Depressed._ His stay in family were worried, and don't get him wrong, he loved them, but they weren't enough. He had nightmares on a nightly basis, and after only a year he had changed. He went from a fun loving, care-free boy to a hard-working, kind-of-an-ass boy. Through his struggles, Haruka remained. He was always in the back of his mind and Rin began to resent the freestyler. _I hate him,_ he decided, after once again failing to reach his time goal in the pool because thoughts of Haruka distracted him.

 

It was this falsely proclaimed hate that drove Rin away after losing to Haru in their race. He ran again, back to Australia, sure that he hated Haruka Nanase more than anything else. His fury made him blind, made him irrationally angry at the smallest things, kept him heated until he returned from Australia for the last time.

 

Rin didn't like the way his heart clenched when he saw the look in Haruka's eyes after he spat the words he truly believed. _I'll never swim with you again!_ It was the truth, wasn't it? Rin didn't really want to swim with them, did he? Then why did it hurt so much to see those blue eyes look so sad? Rin didn't stick around. He ran, for the last time.

 

Rin honestly never anticipated being in this position- Haruka underneath him, looking up with an unexpected gentleness as Rin's tears dripped on his face. There were so many emotions racing through Rin he didn't know what to do with himself. He was angry. Sad. Confused. But mostly- and the only reason he ever returned- he was _in love._ This thought suddenly flared up, burning out everything else, and Rin found himself leaning down…. closer…. closer…. _ah._ Haru’s surprised gasp as Rin’s lips captured his sent a shockwave of _something_ through the redhead’s body. Suddenly he was flying- away from his own universe and into something made entirely of blue eyes and lips that tasted like everything he had ever dreamed. Haru’s hands tangled into Rin’s hair as his mouth slid open and it became a battle for dominance, just like everything they did, and at the moment Rin didn’t care if he won- he couldn’t lose. Not with Haru’s tongue sliding against his- until suddenly it wasn’t. Of course it was Rin’s fault- but to be fair, his sister’s gasp was a very good reason to pull away. Gou was standing a few feet away, just around the corner of the building, her hand covering her mouth and crimson eyes so wide he swore they were about to pop out. “Uh- I-um……. I’m sorry. Congratulations!” and then she was gone. Probably to go screech to the rest of the Iwatobi gang. “Rin?” the shark managed to snap out of his little self-induced trance of staring at the spot Gou had ran from to look down at the boy he just kissed. He prepared himself for the worst- disappointment, anger, disgust- but the only thing he found in those blue eyes was perfect calm. Not the usual blankness, just a serenity that somehow calmed Rin’s own fiery orbs. “Was that- did that mean anything?” _Shit._ “Why the hell would I kiss you? Just for the fun of it? Dammit, of course it meant something! I-“

“I love you.”

Rin blanched. That certainly wasn’t what he expected, not from Haru, at least. As he gazed down he finally saw the fierce blush that had probably covered the other’s fair skin since the moment their lips first touched. Rin’s heart soared and then came to an abrupt stop when he finally processed the weight of the words that had just passed Haru’s lips. He grabbed the other boy’s face and forced him to look him in the face. “Haru. Did you really mean that?” He was answered by another searing kiss. _Things will be okay. He loves me. I love him._

Things started to be not so okay the month after their first Olympic relay. Haru hadn’t been getting much sleep for the past few weeks, and of course Rin had noticed, but he had tagged it as pre-olympic nerves. It was when the other things started that he became really worried- like Haru suddenly forgetting where he had been going/what he was doing, claiming to see _things_ (which Rin first believed was a side effect of the terrible nightmares afflicting his boyfriend when he managed to get a few precious hours of sleep each week), and of course the rapid weight loss, even when Rin made sure Haru ate the right amount of food and all the _right_ foods. Obviously Makoto had noticed things were off when the old team managed to get together in between travelling and jobs. He had grabbed Rin by the arm and dragged him to a corner of the restaurant they had been eating that particular night. _“Rin, what’s wrong with him?”_

_“I don’t know, man. It’s scaring me.”_

He explained the odd behavior to the gentle giant.

_“That- you should take him to the doctor.”_

They were interrupted by a loud thump and gasps. Both heads whipped around in time to see Nagisa rushing for Haru, who had fallen to the ground in front of the aquariums, seemingly unconscious. Rin could swear his heart stopped beating in the few seconds it took for him to make it to the frail boy. _“Oh my god, he’s burning up! Makoto, call-“_ Rin didn’t bother finishing his sentence when he saw that Makoto was already on the phone calling for an ambulance. Rin held Haru in his arms as Nagisa and Rei did their best to shield them from the people all around them. _Please, please for God’s sake, Haru, please be okay._

Haruka Nanase wasn’t okay. The doctors had called his disease Fatal Familial Insomnia. Apparently it was rare, passed down to kids by their parents. And there was no cure. Rin felt himself sob when they got the news that Haru only had a few months left. He felt himself being held by a crying Makoto, the two of them soon enveloped by a hysterical Nagisa and Rei, but he couldn’t feel much else. He didn’t understand why he was crying when all he felt was numb. Eventually Haru came out of his hospital room, looking for all the world like he was already dead. “Guys, let’s go eat.” Such a simple request coming from a person who was just told they only had a few months to live was enough to snap all 4 boys out of their sadness and stare at the dolphin in surprise. “If I only have that much time I don’t want to waste it. I’m going to swim. I’m going to eat. And- and I’m going to hang out with my friends, damn it.” Rin immediately enveloped his boyfriend in a hug, holding back another round of sobs. “Of course.”

 

All of them tried to make the remaining months as easy as possible. Sometimes things would almost seem normal- other times, like when Haru was having one of his random panic attacks and hallucinations, they were reminded of the quickly dwindling time frame. Haru was deteriorating; he continued to lose weight and memory. It broke Rin the most when he had to remind Haru who he was- who everyone else was- and try to bring him back to reality. Sometimes the redhead would hold the smaller boy when he had his few nights of clarity, when he would understand that he wouldn’t be around much longer, and break down into terrified sobs of _“I don’t want to die.”_ Or _“Why me? It’s just not fair………”._ They would cry together until they fell asleep and then it became routine for Rin to help Haru into a bath the next morning while gently reminding him that Rin was in fact his boyfriend and no, Makoto wasn’t a giant teddy bear come to take them all to Hell. It was exhausting. Maddening. _Depressing._

Nobody was ready for it. They knew time was running out, but no one was prepared for the moment Haruka Nanase’s heart stopped beating.

If they weren’t prepared for his death, they certainly weren’t prepared for the funeral. Rin could barely stand, bearing the weight of a shattered heart and the depression that came in a tidal flood. When it was over and Haru was buried under the soft grass, the remaining 4 boys stood in a group, hugging and crying and mourning their best friend. Rin barely felt the warmth of the others’ bodies; it wasn’t the warmth he really wanted. It wasn’t the body he missed- the one he was holding just the week before- it wasn’t Haru. It would never be Haru again.

 

Rin never dated again.

Makoto barely talked to anyone.

Nagisa and Rei found solace in each other, but it was never enough.

The world kept turning.

Hearts still beat.

But Haru was still gone, and things would never be completely okay.


End file.
